The Writer Who Can't Write

I have this feeling that something is wrong with me. Something that makes people not want to tell me the truth. That I do not deserve the truth. That lying to me is the best way to go.  Honestly, I hate getting hurt. Who does? But if it's the way for me to know things and grow, then please do tell me what's real. If it's the way for me to become a better person, then please do not lie to me. If it's the way for me to understand things, then please stop telling me lies. If it's the way for me to know what's real, then tell me the truth.  I realized that I have been lied to for years. By that one person who I thought wouldn't lie to me. He has been keeping a lot of stuff from me. And it's not a good thing.  I prayed for hate. I prayed for hurt. I prayed for negative emotions so that I can move on from him. So I'm taking all of these right now and absorbing everything I need to realize. I will continue nurturing these negative emotions because it is wha...